“There are few authentic prophetic voices among us, guiding truth-seekers along the right path. Among them is Fr. Gordon MacRae, a mighty voice in the prison tradition of John the Baptist, Maximilian Kolbe, Alfred Delp, SJ, and Dietrich Bonhoeffer.”
— Deacon David Jones
A Priest and Prisoner in the Light of Divine Mercy
Fr Seraphim Michalenko, Fr Michael Gaitley, Fr Gordon MacRae, Marian Helper Editor Felix Carroll and Pornchai Moontri share the stage in a wondrous Divine Mercy drama.
Fr Seraphim Michalenko, Fr Michael Gaitley, Fr Gordon MacRae, Marian Helper Editor Felix Carroll and Pornchai Moontri share the stage in a wondrous Divine Mercy drama.
As a young man, I depended far too much on my own resources. I recognize today in the humility of hindsight that they were never quite up to the task. But back then, I knew everything. What a dumbass I have since become! I now know nothing, and cannot write a single word except in the light of Divine Mercy. My life’s path recalls the words of Dante Alighieri as he opened his epic literary masterpiece, The Divine Comedy. His story begins in a dark forest on Good Friday in the year 1300:
“When I had journeyed midway upon our life’s path, I found myself within a shadowed forest, for I had lost the way that does not stray. How can I say what wood that was, that savage forest which even now in recall renews my fear? So bitter death is hardly more severe! But to tell the good I found there, I will also tell of the other things I saw.”
In my post two weeks ago, “Wrongful Convictions: The Other Police Misconduct,” I told of some of the other things I saw — a forest of dark things like corruption and deep injustice surrounded me once. Like Dante, I cannot tell of these — though they must be told — without the light of a profoundly wonderful grace I discovered amid all that suffering.
In many posts over time, I have told snippets of the story of Divine Mercy, of how it entered midway upon my life’s journey, and of how it dramatically transcended my prison walls. I have never before put it all together in a post, and I cannot pretend to do so now because it would fill a book. Perhaps one day, if I have the tools to do so, this story will become a book. For now, however, all I have is this humble blog.
What prompted this retelling of my Divine Mercy journey is the death of Father Seraphim Michalenko, MIC, who on this Earth became a driving force in the beatification and canonization of St. Maria Faustina and the promotion of her famous Diary. My friend, Marian Helper Editor Felix Carroll, published a moving eulogy which included this paragraph:
“Father Seraphim Michalenko, MIC, the world-renowned expert on the life and spirituality of St. Faustina — the man who smuggled photographic images of the pages of St. Faustina’s Diary out of Communist-occupied Poland in the 1970s and later documented her beatification and canonization miracles — died Thursday, February 11, 2021, from illness related to Covid 19. ... Side by side with Blessed Michael Sopocko, Pope St. John Paul II, and St. Faustina herself, Fr. Seraphim stands as a central figure who helped make the Divine Mercy message and devotion the greatest grassroots movement in the history of the Church.”
A few years ago, well into his eighties, Father Seraphim ventured from his home at the National Shrine of The Divine Mercy in Stockbridge, Massachusetts for a drive of several hours to Concord, New Hampshire. He came to offer Mass in prison, and to interview Pornchai Moontri and me about the substance and source of our Divine Mercy journeys as we passed through the dark wood of prison.
My story, which I have told before, begins in 1988. Father Richard Drabik, MIC was Provincial Superior of the Marians of the Immaculate Conception, a post from which he wrote the Preface for Divine Mercy in My Soul, also known as the Diary of Saint Faustina. You will find his Preface at the beginning of every copy of this mysterious book.
A few years later when he concluded his term as Provincial, Father Drabik was recruited to be a spiritual director for the Servants of the Paraclete Renewal Center for priests in New Mexico where I once served as Director of Admissions. Father Richard became my spiritual director for several years, and the finest one I ever had as a priest.
Grace Follows Even the Darkest Night
I will never forget the moment Father Richard stopped by my office one night early in April, 1993 to tell me that he would be leaving that week for Rome to take part in the Beatification of Sister Maria Faustina by Pope John Paul II on Divine Mercy Sunday. Father Richard invited me to write a private intention to be placed on the altar for the Mass of Beatification. Then I promptly forgot all about it.
Saint Faustina was later canonized by Pope John Paul II on Divine Mercy Sunday in 2000, a saint canonized by a saint. Now that I think of it, the saints who have had the most influence on my life as a priest and as a prisoner, and ultimately also on Pornchai Moontri’s life, were canonized by Pope John Paul II. Besides Saint Faustina they include Saint Maximilian Kolbe, Saint Padre Pio, and the Beatification of Mother Teresa.
I know the latter two do not retain their Earthly titles, but I cannot imagine calling them anything else. These influencers now also include Saint John Paul II himself who left a giant footprint on both the Church and my life as a priest.
I knew nothing of Saint Faustina when Father Richard made his request, and if he ever spoke of Divine Mercy in our sessions, I retained none of it. If memory serves, I did most of the talking in spiritual direction. I hope I have since learned to listen as well. Father Richard, like many at the National Shrine of The Divine Mercy, is still in contact with me. I hope he might be reading this.
A week or so after inviting me to write my intention for the Mass of Beatification in Rome, I had forgotten all about it. Father Richard stopped by my office again on the night before his departure and reminded me of it. I was especially busy with God only knows what. I told him I would bring it to him in ten minutes. I then grabbed a piece of note paper and quickly wrote this spontaneous prayer:
“I ask Blessed Faustina’s intercession that I may have the strength and courage to be the priest God wants me to be.”
I sealed my intention in a small envelope and brought it to Father Richard. I watched him tuck it into a pocket of his jacket, and thought no more of it. The Beatification of Saint Faustina was presided over by Pope John Paul II on Divine Mercy Sunday, the Sunday after Easter, but it was not yet called that. It was on the day of St. Faustina's Mass of Canonization, on April 30, 2000 during the Great Jubilee Year that Pope John Paul II declared in his homily that from hereon the Second Sunday of Easter will be the day of Divine Mercy.
But none of this meant anything to me. Today, it means everything to me. By the time Father Richard returned from Rome after the Mass of Beatification in 1993, I had been arrested on false charges from the distant past, and taken away. In 1994, after refusing multiple “plea deal” offers to plead guilty and serve one year in prison, I was sentenced to a term of sixty-seven years. That story is conveyed in the post cited above.
I spent the next twelve years in the dark forest of Dante’s Inferno. I heard from no one. I communicated with few. In all that time, I somehow retained an identity as a priest. Because I maintained my innocence, I spent all that time in punitive prison housing with eight men sharing each cell. An officer in that unit saw that I had a typewriter so he asked me to volunteer to type some inventory forms for him each week. After a few weeks he asked me if I wanted something in return. He meant extra food. I asked for the use of an empty storage room for one hour on Sunday nights to offer private Mass.
A Summons to Divine Mercy
It was not what this Sergeant expected to hear. He said he would have to present the unusual request to his own supervisor. Holy Week was coming up, and I hoped I might have an approval by Easter. It came a week too late. My first Mass in prison was offered in a storage closet on April 30, 2000, which I only later learned was the first official Divine Mercy Sunday and the day Saint Faustina was canonized.
That was year six, midway in my twelve years in darkness. Six years later, I was visited in prison by Father James McCurry, who is today the Minister Provincial of the Franciscan Friars Conventual of the Our Lady of the Angels Province. Unbeknownst to me at the time, he had also been a vice-postulator for the cause of sainthood for Saint Maximilian Kolbe who was canonized by Pope John Paul II in 1982, the year I was ordained. Father McCurry learned of me from some other priest. He was in the area and thought he would arrange a visit.
His first words in the visiting room, after introducing himself, were, “What do you know about St. Maximilian Kolbe?” I knew little beyond the fact that he offered his life to save that of another prisoner in the horror of Auschwitz. We talked about that but our visit was brief. He had to catch a plane. He said he would be sending me something. A week later, a small biography of Saint Maximilian arrived along with a card depicting him in both his Franciscan habit and his Auschwitz uniform.
By that time, I had been moved to slightly better prison quarters, perhaps thanks to the Sergeant who was impressed that I asked for a place to offer Mass instead of extra food. I put the image of Saint Maximilian on the battered steel mirror in my cell. Through tears, I realized that on that same day I was a priest in prison a day longer than I had been a priest in freedom. The darkness I felt was overwhelming. I would eventually write multiple posts about the impact this Saint has had on our lives, most notably “Saint Maximilian Kolbe and the Gift of Noble Defiance.”
Shortly after Saint Maximilian arrived on the mirror in my cell, Pornchai Moontri was sent here after fourteen grueling years lost in and out of solitary confinement in a Maine prison. I was bitter and he was broken. All hope had virtually died in our lives. Providence moved Pornchai from one place to another here, and then he ended up living with me. In his moving recent guest post, “Free at Last Thanks to God and You,” he recounted the day he first walked into my cell and saw the image of Saint Maximilian on the mirror. “Is this you?” he asked.
From that moment on, we were caught up in the grasp of Divine Mercy. As you know, Pornchai became a devout Catholic and was received into the Church on Divine Mercy Sunday, 2010. Knowing the importance of this conversion for him, I was compelled to set aside all the bitterness of false witness and wrongful imprisonment that I carried like a crushing cross in my own Calvary. Confronting the brokeness of Pornchai meant also confronting my own in the light of Divine Mercy, and it salvaged my life as a priest.
Pornchai Moontri was featured, as you know, in a profoundly wonderful book, Loved, Lost, Found: 17 Divine Mercy Conversions, by Marian Helper Editor Felix Carroll. Father Seraphim Michalenko brought the book to Thailand where he presented a retreat to Divine Mercy Thailand. He read them the chapter about Pornchai, and a future, long since thought to be hopeless, was born for him.
We were also invited to take part in a series of 33-Day retreats in Father Michael Gaitley’s “Hearts Afire” program beginning with “33 Days to Morning Glory.” As a result, dozens of other prisoners followed us on this path and many were converted. I will link to the most moving of their stories at the end of this post.
And Divine Mercy has not let up — not even for a moment. I just learned that in 1994, the year I was sent to prison, Relevant Radio host, Drew Mariani, produced a film along with the Marians entitled, “Time for Mercy.” Late last month, some 26 years later, Drew Mariani interviewed me in prison. The interview is available at our “Special Events” page.
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Note from Father Gordon MacRae: Please continue to celebrate Divine Mercy this year through these additional posts with inspiring true accounts of how Divine Mercy has impacted our lives:
Coming Home to the Catholic Faith I Left Behind by Michael Ciresi
I Come to the Catholic Church for Healing and Hope by Pornchai Moontri
When Justice Came To Pornchai Moontri Mercy Followed
Clare Farr, a Western Australia trademarks attorney, read about Pornchai Moontri at These Stone Walls and set in motion a Divine Mercy saga spanning five continents
Clare Farr, a Western Australia trademarks attorney, read about Pornchai Moontri at These Stone Walls and set in motion a Divine Mercy saga spanning five continents.
Introduction by Father Gordon MacRae
The following is a guest post by Clare Farr, a registered trademarks attorney in Western Australia. Clare is partner with her husband, Malcolm Farr, principal of the Farr Intellectual Property law firm near Perth. She is the mother of five young adults. In 2003, while reading These Stone Walls, Clare and Malcolm immersed themselves, entirely pro bono, in the cause of Pornchai Moontri.
Clare, especially, served as a bridge to find and cultivate essential contacts for Pornchai to secure a future in Thailand, and to seek justice for him in the United States. Without Clare Farr’s assistance, this story I told in “Pornchai Moontri: Bangkok to Bangor, Survivor of the Night” could not have come entirely to light.
Please share Clare’s amazing account of Divine Mercy that connects people on five continents for a story that Pornchai Moontri once summarized in a single sentence: “I awoke one day with a future when up to then all I ever had was a past.” It is an honor to present this guest post by Clare Farr.
When Justice Came to Pornchai Moontri, Mercy Followed
It was in about the year 2010 when I first read about the plight of Fr Gordon and his cellmate, Pornchai Moontri. The more I read about Fr Gordon, I became convinced of his innocence and outraged that this holy and devout Catholic priest could be sent to prison given the paucity and quality of the evidence against him.
Many people including highly regarded journalists and lawyers find this case very troubling yet the higher ups in the Diocese of Manchester, government lawyers, politicians and those in the judiciary must have very thick skins and are prepared to let this case rest and turn their gaze the other way. They must rest their laurels on the fact that the “legal system did its job.” Well, it didn’t — it was an abysmal failure. Quite frankly, the outcome is deeply unsettling and a blight on the justice system of the United States.
The Fr Gordon MacRae that I have come to know is a man of tremendous intellect and wisdom who counsels and shares his insight and understanding of the Catholic faith to the many among his global readership as well as his fellow prisoners in the New Hampshire Prison for Men. He is just about as fine a priest as I have ever known, and the way that he has been treated by the Diocese of Manchester and many other Catholic priests is quite disgraceful.
Before the commencement of MacRae’s trial, he was not given any chance to respond to the allegations against him, yet the Diocese issued a press release in which it stated:
“The Church has been a victim of the actions of Gordon MacRae just like these individuals…”
If the Church believed Fr Gordon was guilty — what was a jury to think? The trial was compromised before it even began — sabotaged by the Diocese of Manchester.
Three years ago Bishop Libasci wrote to me “…please be assured that both my predecessor and I have understood and fulfilled our obligations as bishops with respect to Father MacRae’s rights under civil and canon law”. At the time of the press release, Bishop Leo O’Neil was the head of the diocese and he was not Bishop Libasci’s predecessor but rather, one of his predecessors. However, the upshot of acts undertaken during Bishop O’Neil’s term as Bishop have had a never-ending adverse impact on Fr Gordon and this should be acknowledged and addressed by his successors.
I’m certainly no expert on canon law though I as far as I know canonical equity dictates that there must be a balance between the spirit of the Gospel and the salvation of souls. I fail to see how doing nothing to address past wrongs done to Fr Gordon, including but not limited to dealing with Fr Gordon’s incarceration as a live issue (which is partly the Diocese’s own fault) and the payment of a regular stipend, has met these requirements.
Whatever Fr Gordon’s fate is, there is one thing for sure: when he passes on to the next life he will be greatly rewarded for all the good he has done in his life. Similarly, those who have lied about him, who have persecuted him or who have added to his misery and his circumstances will also have to stand before the Creator and account for their actions — or inaction. Heaven help them.
Bangor, Maine
A Stranger in a Strange Land
In late 2013 I chanced upon an article about Pornchai Moontri by Charlene Duline, “Pornchai Moontri is Worth Saving.” Charlene was pleading for anyone who could advocate on behalf of Pornchai, so I contacted her. I thought that even though I live in Western Australia, I might be able to help somehow. At that stage Pornchai had been in prison for more than 20 years. There was no question that he was involved in the death of Michael Scott McDowell and that a jury had found him guilty of murder. I knew that he was far from a model prisoner at the start of his sentence, but that he had a remarkable conversion to the Catholic faith and that he had achieved an abundance of qualifications in prison. Indeed, he seemed to be a model prisoner.
From everything I had read about Pornchai and the trial, and from all that I have come to know about this story, it seems that a 45-year sentence is grossly excessive. Pornchai had unsuccessfully appealed the sentence decision many years ago — so it seemed that the only recourse for him was to petition the Governor of Maine to exercise clemency for his release from prison. After a great deal of research into Pornchai’s life, in March 2015 we submitted a petition to the Governor of Maine seeking an order of executive clemency. In October 2015 it was rejected.
Pornchai has never had an opportunity to tell a court about his life and what led to his conviction. He has never really told the full story, some of which he did not even know about — but I know it. Father Gordon knows about it too and wrote much of it in these pages last week. What follows is the story that I want to emphasize, so here goes…
Pornchai was born to a family in Thailand and at age two he and his brother were abandoned by both parents and raised by their maternal grandparents for the next 9 years. With them, he had a wonderful family life and he and his brother were happy and well looked after. With their mother absent for so long, they came to believe that their aunt was their real mother. Pornchai was much loved by his mother’s family.
When he was 11, his mother, Wannee came to retrieve the boys. She told them that she was their mother and that she was going to take them with her to live in America, and that they would have a good life with her and her new American husband, Richard Alan Bailey. Within two weeks of arriving in Maine, Pornchai was violently sexually abused by Bailey. Wannee had unknowingly married a sexual predator and the two brothers became his victims. Pornchai ran away from home but was returned home by the police. He tried to tell them what had been happening but he couldn’t speak English and they couldn’t understand him, so he was returned to live in the home of his abuser. He had only just turned 12 years of age. It was December of 1985.
Pornchai was unable to tell his mother at that time because Bailey had threatened what would happen if he told anyone. About a week later he did tell her about the abuse and her reaction was to refuse to believe him and to punish him for telling lies. The abuse was ongoing, and Pornchai ran away again and again until eventually he had no home to return to. He became a homeless teenager on the streets of a foreign country. For several years he was in and out of juvenile detention centers, stayed when he could in the homes of friends, lived in a treehouse, under a bridge and found shelter wherever he could. He was often forced to steal food to survive. Eventually the court would punish him with detention and other penalties. He spent time in juvenile detention facilities and he had some counselling. At these facilities he formed good relationships with a lot of people but there was always some bullying and racial vilification by other students and with the emotional baggage that he was carrying, sometimes it was all too much to bear and he would become enraged. Eventually he was expelled from the school when he acted up against this abuse.
At two separate juvenile detention facilities he disclosed the abuse by his stepfather. His teachers and therapists believed him and reported the allegations to their superiors. Referring to the abuse allegation, one 1988 report to Child Protection stated:
“….Totally destroyed boy’s faith in family — mother made aware — did nothing. Boy began to habitually run away — Boy terrified father will take out some type of revenge on mother.”
When Pornchai was still living in Bailey’s home, his mother felt too threatened by Bailey to believe her son’s story of abuse. She then became especially hostile to him, called him names and lashed out at him in a number of ways. His home life had become highly dysfunctional and his mother was also physically and emotionally abusing him and telling him that she wished he hadn’t been born, most likely as a symptom of her own frustration and anger in living in a highly toxic environment with a violent and abusive man.
Eventually Wannee did accept that he told the truth but notwithstanding, she put much pressure on Pornchai not to discuss the abuse with anyone. She was living in fear herself.
After his expulsion from the Goodwill Hinckley School shortly before his 18th birthday, Pornchai tried to lead a normal life and get a job, finally finding work as a bus boy with a chain restaurant, but he was fired because he couldn’t provide a residential address which had been a condition of his employment.
As he lived on the streets and had received threats, he began to carry a knife for protection. At 18 years of age and after becoming very drunk one night, he went with his friend Danny Williams to a supermarket. There he got into an altercation in the parking lot. When tackled by a much larger and heavier man, in a reflex reaction he pulled the knife and Michael Scott McDowell died. It was unintentional, but nevertheless it was a terrible action for which an innocent man died. For the last 26 years Pornchai has carried with him the life of the man who died and after his conversion prayed diligently for his soul.
Whilst there is no excuse for the death of Michael Scott McDowell — I ask the reader to consider that moment when Pornchai, a small and light framed 18-year-old was tackled by a much heavier built man. Given his history of sexual assault by an older man — isn’t it just possible that mixed up with the distress of the moment there was the revulsion and terror of having a large man pin him down and take control of him? I can definitely see the connection and understand why using a knife in these drunken circumstances would have occurred.
While he was in prison and awaiting trial, Wannee visited Pornchai and pleaded with him not to mention the sexual assaults in court, as she would suffer at the hands of Richard Bailey if he did so. Against legal advice, Pornchai, fearing for his mother’s safety, refused to present any defence at trial.
In the sentencing phase of the trial, Bailey had written to the trial judge on behalf of himself and Wannee and essentially blamed Pornchai’s situation on him getting in with a bad crowd and his difficulty in adjusting to life in America. He wrote:
“As a father, who is prejudiced by love for his son, and also a former law enforcement officer that a lengthy sentence for such a young man would not serve the State of Maine, the McDowell family, or Pornchai Moontri.”
That’s about as kind as he had ever been to Pornchai. He has never once visited him in prison, has written only one letter to him and even then, he merely apologised to Pornchai for being so hard on him. He has never provided any material support for him since Pornchai was arrested.
Wannee divorced Bailey in 2000. By that time, she and Bailey had relocated to Guam where they owned property. They agreed on a division of assets and court orders were made including an order that their home be sold. In February 2000 Wannee returned to Guam in order to confront Bailey about delays in the sale of the home and the payment of monies which he was supposed to pay her. Not long afterwards, Bailey reported her missing from their isolated home in Guam and the following day he reported that he found her body. Her autopsy report and death certificate note that her death was the result of a homicide. No one has ever been charged for her death.
On the night she went missing she telephoned her niece and told her that Bailey was in a rage and that if she didn’t return from Guam, it meant she had been murdered. Prophetic words…
Under the court orders Bailey was to pay certain money to Wannee beyond April 2000. It appears that the administrator of Wannee’s estate was not aware that Bailey still owed money to the Estate so the debt was not pursued. At the time of her death Pornchai was in prison so there was no one around who would have known about the court orders other than Bailey.
Following a police investigation and grand jury indictments, in early 2017 Bailey was charged with 40 counts of Gross Sexual Misconduct. The victims were Pornchai and his brother Priwan.
Knowing that there has been a criminal case against Bailey has been difficult for Pornchai over the past few years because he has had to relive the past, give statements and go over things again and again. Thank God that his cellmate is Fr Gordon MacRae who provides spiritual advice and good counsel. Fr Gordon has had a huge positive impact on Pornchai’s life. Without his continuous efforts to pursue justice and for Pornchai’s story to be made known, the truth would never have come out.
In March 2017 the Bailey case went before the Superior Court of Maine, and following a number of arraignments, the matter was before the Court September 11, 2018. On that date, Bailey formally entered a plea of nolo contendere — his attorney indicated that Bailey denied any wrongdoing but that he would not contest the charges and agreed to be sentenced by the court. The Victims Impact Statements of both brothers were read to the court and the judge was quite shaken and deeply moved by the statements. The case was adjourned to the following day, September 12.
As is common in the US legal system, the Office of the District Attorney had agreed on a plea deal with Bailey’s attorney which provided for a suspended sentence of 17 years with a probation period imposing strict conditions — but the length of such probation had not been agreed upon. However, the judge found Bailey guilty on all 40 charges and imposed a longer suspended sentence of 18 years, the whole of which would be subject to very strict probation conditions. It appears that the judge had to take Bailey’s claims of poor health into consideration (he is four years older than Fr Gordon), but also the impact of a trial on both brothers. At the hearing, Pornchai’s brother was quite visibly distraught. Despite there being no prison term for Bailey, I think that justice has been served in this case. The judge was obviously more than satisfied that Bailey is guilty and ordered a longer sentence on probation than in the plea agreement that was submitted to the court.
The Divine Mercy Redemption
Over the past few years, myself and others have been planning what happens with Pornchai when he is eventually deported at the end of his sentence. Then out of the blue, a wonderful lady from Bangkok named Yela Smit contacted Fr Gordon to find out how she could help. Yela was the co-director of the Divine Mercy Apostolate in Thailand. She has since gathered a lot of support for Pornchai and offered practical assistance. We have spoken a number of times on the phone and I distinctly remember her saying to me “He’s going to have a wonderful life in Thailand, he’ll wonder why he ever stayed so long in America”. Yela’s input was invaluable. Knowing about Pornchai’s conversion and his Marian consecration — to find Yela was a Godsend as are her friends, Khun Peter in Thailand and Viktor Weyand, an American travel agent. Viktor was a co-founder of a Divine Mercy orphanage and school in Thailand, and two years ago travelled to Thailand for the priesthood ordination of the first resident of the orphanage. Viktor has since become a very dear friend to Pornchai, and he and his wife have visited Pornchai at Christmas time.
In “A Stitch in Time: Threads of the Tapestry of God”, Fr Gordon wrote about this amazing tapestry where the lives of people from all over the world touch each other, and I am proud to have been part of it. Fr Gordon wrote:
“This story now connects people on five continents who have no obvious connection beyond their interest in Pornchai’s life and their immersion in the work of Divine Mercy.”
People from around the world have all used their skills and life experience to help Pornchai, all being driven and guided by Heaven. We all had an important part to play and we did what was expected of us.
Pornchai’s story is a great story on so many different levels. It is a story of faith and Divine Mercy. It’s a story of great tragedy followed by a dramatic conversion, a Marian consecration and a faith filled life. It’s the story of a young agnostic child in Bangkok who became a truly holy and devout man with hope for tomorrow and who survived the most brutal prison life. He is not just prisoner number 77948 — he is a truly remarkable and unique man who will give witness and glory to God.
It’s also a story of the power of prayer and of Divine Providence. None of us could have achieved anything without help from above. All of you who have prayed and fasted and given practical assistance to Pornchai and Fr Gordon are also a very important part of the tapestry. Without faith and prayer, nothing would have been achieved. So, consider it a collective effort guided by the Lord with a lot of help from Our Lady. All of the key players who have and are helping Pornchai have a connection with Divine Mercy and are Marian devotees and we all came together to help Pornchai.
Fr Gordon has spoken about Fr Seraphim Michalenko’s involvement in Pornchai’s life. Several years ago, a friend asked me if I wanted to go to a talk by a visiting priest to be held at the home of a friend in the Perth hill in Western Australia. I had never heard of the priest before but knew that he was going to give a talk on Divine Mercy. His name was Fr Seraphim Michalenko. At the talk I found out more about St Faustina’s revelations and of the two miracles that led to the canonisation of Faustina. I even had a private chat with Fr Seraphim.
In the 2014 post, Fr Seraphim Michalenko on a Mission of Divine Mercy, Fr Gordon told us that the Felix Carroll book, Love Lost Found – 17 Divine Mercy Conversions with its chapter about Pornchai was sent by Fr Seraphim to Yela Smit in Thailand. That’s how Yela became involved. Another Divine Mercy connection is that Fr Seraphim was the director of the National Shrine of The Divine Mercy in Stockbridge, Massachusetts and he has been a visiting priest to the chapel of the New Hampshire Prison for Men and has also participated in a Divine Mercy Retreat at the prison. What are the odds that I would ever meet Fr Seraphim? — and the fact that he has a connection to Pornchai and Fr Gordon is amazing. The tapestry Fr Gordon wrote about gets more amazing by the day and I know that I will never know the full extent of it.
Pornchai will probably be in prison until at least the first half of 2021 when he will be eligible for release and once released he will be held in detention by Immigrations and Customs Enforcement. He will then be deported to his native Thailand because he is not an American citizen.
Pornchai has made the most of prison life and has received a good education and has many vocational skills. He is not bitter at all. As for his thoughts on Bailey — when asked by the Assistant District Attorney if he wanted Bailey to go to prison — Pornchai said to her, “No, I don’t want him to go to prison — I just want him to know that what he did was wrong.” Awesome! I don’t know if I could utter those words if I was in Pornchai’s position but whilst old memories will always be there, he has forgiven Bailey. He looks back on the past with great sadness, but doesn’t dwell on it and he has great hope for the future. It will be a culture shock to return to a country where he no longer speaks the language but he has new friends to meet and a career to begin.
Many people have prayed for Pornchai and continue to keep him in their prayers. Without a doubt this has helped him enormously and God’s providence has also rained down upon him.
Please keep him in your prayers and pray that he will transition smoothly into Thai life, that he will forge a good career that will make him financially independent and that he will truly find peace.
And continue to pray for Fr Gordon MacRae who in my eyes is a living saint. Without him, his tenacity and unwavering efforts to help Pornchai, this story would have never come to light.
Fr Seraphim Michalenko on a Mission of Divine Mercy
Midway in our Consoling the Heart of Jesus retreat in prison, Fr Seraphim Michalenko, Director of the National Shrine of The Divine Mercy, fulfilled Hebrews 13:3.
Midway in our Consoling the Heart of Jesus retreat in prison, Fr Seraphim Michalenko, Director of the National Shrine of The Divine Mercy, fulfilled Hebrews 13:3.
Some strange and interesting things are happening behind These Stone Walls this summer, and it’s a task and a half to stay ahead of them and reflect a little so I can write of them. In too many ways to describe, we sometimes feel swept off our feet by the intricate threads of connection that are being woven, and sometimes revealed.
I wasn’t even going to have a post for this week. I spent the last ten days immersed in a major writing project that I just finished. I knew it would be a struggle to type a post on top of that. I also had no topic. Absolutely nothing whatsoever came to mind. So I decided to just let readers know that I need to skip a week on TSW. Yet here I am, and it’s being written on the fly as I struggle to type it and get it in the mail in time.
What brought on this frenzy to get something posted on this mid-summer day? Well, first of all I awoke this morning and looked at the calendar, and realized that the post date I decided to skip is also the Memorial of Our Lady of Mount Carmel. It commemorates the apparition of our Blessed Mother to Saint Simon Stock, founder of the Carmelite Order, in the year 1215. She promised a special blessing to those who would wear her scapular. According to the explanation of this Memorial in the Daily Roman Missal, “Countless Christians have taken advantage of Our Lady’s protection.”
“Protection.” It seems a strange word to describe what we might expect from devotion to Mary. Most TSW readers remember my post, “Behold Your Mother! 33 Days to Morning Glory” about the Marian Consecration which Pornchai Maximilian and I entered into on the Solemnity of Christ the King in 2013. Felix Carroll also wrote of it — with a nice photo of us — in “Mary is at Work Here” in Marian Helper magazine. [Flash Version and PDF Version]
Throughout that 33 Days retreat leading up to our Consecration, I was plagued with the creepy feeling that this was all going to cost us something, that maybe Pornchai and I were opening ourselves to further suffering and trials by Consecrating to Mary the ordeals we are now living. What we have both found since our Marian Consecration, however, has been a sort of protection, a subtle grace that seems to be weaving itself in and around us, permeating our lives. Exactly what has been its cost? It has cost us something neither of us ever imagined we could ever afford to pay. The price tag for such grace is trust, and where we live, that is a precious commodity not so easily invested, but very easily taken from us.
I am amazed at the number of TSW readers who have written to me about their decisions to commence the 33 Days retreat, and commit themselves to Marian Consecration. I received a letter this week from Mary Fran, a reader and frequent correspondent who is completing her 33 Days retreat with her Marian Consecration on the day this is posted, the Memorial of Our Lady of Mount Carmel. She is going into this with just the right frame of mind and spirit. I hope she doesn’t mind, but here’s an excerpt of her letter:
“This is a very good retreat. I will be sorry to see it over. I have the Consecration Prayer typed out on pretty paper in preparation for the big day. A new beginning. A new way of life. Under new management.”
The truth is, Mary Fran, that it will never be over. But I like your idea of a life “under new management.” The concept seems to have a lot less to do with what Marian Consecration might cost in terms of trials to be offered, and more to do with what graces might be gained to endure them when they come. I’m not sure of why or exactly when it started, but after receiving the Eucharist since my own Consecration I have begun to pray the Memorare, a prayer attributed to Saint Bernard of Clairvaux that best expresses our confidence in Mary as repository of grace and, therefore, protection:
“Remember, O most gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that anyone who fled to your protection, implored your help, or sought your intercession was left unaided. Inspired with this confidence, I fly unto you, O Virgin of virgins, my Mother. To you I come, sinful and sorrowful. O Mother of the Word incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in your mercy hear and answer me. Amen.”
Trust Is the Currency of Grace
In a post last month, “Father’s Day in Prison Consoling the Heart of Jesus,” I wrote a little about how much of a daily ordeal our prisons can sometimes be. Near the end of that post, I quoted a brief dialogue between Father Michael Gaitley, author of Consoling the Heart of Jesus, and Father Seraphim Michalenko, Director of The National Shrine of The Divine Mercy. Their discussion is worth expanding a bit for this post. In fact, it was part of this week’s assigned reading in our Consoling the Heart of Jesus retreat in which we are at the midway point behind these prison walls. So here is a little more of that conversation:
“Father Gaitley: ‘And we want to console Jesus in the best possible way … and the best way to console Him is to remove the thorn that hurts His heart the most, the thorn that is lack of trust in His merciful love … and the best way to remove that thorn and console Him is to trust Him.’
”Father Seraphim: ‘And how do you LIVE trust? What is its concrete expression in your daily 1iving? … The way you live that trust is by praise and thanksgiving, to praise and thank God in all things. That’s what the Lord said to St. Faustina.’”
It struck me just today that the new trial asked of me in Marian Consecration is to imitate her trust, her famous fiat to the seemingly impossible: “Be it done to me according to Thy word.” Such trust is not an easy thing to embrace when the world turns dark, when freedom is taken by forces beyond our control, when fortune fades, when health fails, when loved ones are lost, when love itself is lost, when evil seems to win all around us, when depression, the noon-day devil, wants to rule both day and night.
That almost seems to sum up prison, and as such we are all destined for the trials of life in some form or another. We are all destined for some form of prison. So many readers have asked me for an update on our friend, Anthony, of whom I wrote recently in “Pentecost, Priesthood, and Death in the Afternoon.” Anthony is in prison dying of cancer. Several weeks ago, he could no longer bear the pain he was in so he was moved to the prison medical unit for palliative care. He came to the prison chapel for Mass the following Sunday, and the one after that. He was not there at Mass last week, and it is very possible we will not see Anthony again in this life.
Though he is but 200 yards away locked in another building, prisons pay no heed to the bonds of connection between human beings in captivity. Once Anthony was moved elsewhere, we may not visit him, inquire about him, or even hear from him. That is one of the great crosses of prison, and the welfare of that person and his soul is something about which we can now only trust. We can only be consoled by what YOU have done in our stead. When I last saw Anthony, he smiled and said, “I have gotten so much mail and so many cards I feel totally surrounded by God’s love.”
Father Michael Gaitley summed up nicely the road out of this dense forest of all our anxious cares:
“So the best way to console Jesus’ Heart is to give him our trust, and according to the expert [Fr Seraphim Michalenko] the best way to live trust is with an attitude of praise and thanksgiving, the way of joyful, trustful acceptance of God’s will.”
Opening Impenetrable Doors
At the end of “Dostoevsky in Prison and the Perils of Odysseus,” I wrote, “the hand of God is somewhere in all this, visible only in the back of the tapestry where we cannot yet see. He is working among the threads, weaving together the story of us.” Some readers liked that imagery, but it’s also true. It really happens and is really happening in our lives right now. I have experienced it, and Pornchai has recently experienced it in a very big way, but only with eyes opened by trust. Here’s how.
In the months after Pornchai Maximilian Moontri and I first met, United States Immigration Judge Leonard Shapiro had just ruled that Pornchai must be deported from the U.S. to Thailand upon whatever point he is to be released from prison. The very thought of this was dismal, like stepping off a cliff in dense fog with no safe landing in sight. Pornchai had only a “Plan B”: to make certain that he never leaves prison.
I was deeply concerned for him, and tried to put myself in his shoes. How does a person get literally dumped into a country only vaguely familiar with no human connections whatsoever? How would he live? How could he even survive? So I told him something so totally foreign to both of us that I shuddered and doubted even as I was saying the words. I told him he has to abandon his “Plan B” and trust. Trust me and trust God. What was I saying?! I wasn’t even sure I trusted at all.
Three years later, Pornchai became a Catholic on Divine Mercy Sunday 2010. A lot of people don’t realize that this was completely by “accident.” And it caused me to worry even more about his future. Thailand is a Buddhist nation. Less than one percent of its people are Catholic. I wondered how becoming Catholic could possibly serve him in a country and culture from which he was already completely alienated and in which he must somehow survive.
Pornchai didn’t even know that the time he was choosing for his entry into the Church was Divine Mercy Sunday. What he had originally planned was to surprise me by telling me of his decision to be Baptized on my birthday, April 9, which was a Friday in 2010. It was, in his mind, to be a birthday present. Some present! I wasn’t even trusting that this was a good idea.
So Pornchai went to talk with the prison’s Catholic chaplain, Deacon Jim Daly to help arrange this. The Chaplain asked a local priest to come to the prison for the Baptism, but he was only available to do this on Saturday, April 10. I stood in as proxy for Pornchai’s Godparents, one in Belgium and one in Indianapolis, while Vincentian Father Anthony Kuzia Baptized and Confirmed Pornchai.
The next day was Divine Mercy Sunday, and it just so happened that Bishop John McCormack was coming to the prison for his annual Mass that day. So just the night before, I explained to Pornchai about Saint Faustina, Divine Mercy, why Pope John Paul II designated the Sunday after Easter to be Divine Mercy Sunday, and how this devotion seemed to sweep the whole world. Pornchai thus received his First Eucharist and was received into the Church on Divine Mercy Sunday, and Whoever planned this, it wasn’t us!
Then because I mentioned that fact on TSW a few times, it got the attention of Felix Carroll, a writer for Marian Helper magazine. Felix then asked if he could write of Pornchai’s Divine Mercy connection for the Marian.org website in an article entitled, “Mercy – Inside Those Stone Walls.” The response to that article was amazing. From all over the world, people commented on it and circulated it. Felix wrote that “the story of Pornchai lit up our website like no other!”
So then in the eleventh hour, Felix Carroll pulled a book he was just about to publish. It was supposed to be about 16 Divine Mercy conversions, but Felix changed the titled to Loved, Lost, Found: 17 Divine Mercy Conversions, and added an expanded chapter about Pornchai Moontri’s life and conversion. The chapter even mentions me and These Stone Walls, though I really had very little to do with Pornchai’s conversion. Pornchai and I received copies of the book, looked at each other, and simultaneously asked, “How did this happen?”
The Needlepoint of God
The book went everywhere, including into the hands of Father Seraphim Michalenko, Director of the National Shrine of The Divine Mercy and the person I quoted on the issue of trust in this post. Father Seraphim became an instrument for the threads God was weaving for Pornchai. He sent the book to another contact, Yela Smit, a co-director of the Divine Mercy Apostolate in Bangkok, Thailand. The result was simply astonishing, and the threads of connection just keep being woven together. I wrote of this incredible account in “Knock and the Door Will Open: Divine Mercy in Bangkok Thailand.”
In that post, I wrote of how I undertook responsibility for easing Pornchai’s burden by trying to find him connections in Thailand only to be frustrated every step of the way. Then, in spite of myself, in the back of the tapestry where we cannot yet see, those threads were being woven together miraculously, and trust found a foundation in the dawn of hope. Suddenly, through nothing either of us did or didn’t do, the cross of fear and dread about how Pornchai would survive alone in Thailand was lifted from him.
Pornchai and I went to Sunday Mass in the Prison Chapel last week. The priest who is usually here is away for a few weeks so we heard it would be someone “filling in.” It was Father Seraphim Michalenko, MIC, 84 years old and the man who opened the doors of Divine Mercy for Pornchai in Thailand where God has accomplished some amazing needlework. Father Seraphim was accompanied by Eric Mahl who also has a chapter in Felix Carroll’s Loved, Lost, Found, and who has become a good friend to me and Pornchai. They both returned that evening for a session of our Consoling the Heart of Jesus Retreat. Pornchai was able to meet with Father Seraphim for a long talk. He has seen firsthand the evidence of Divine Mercy, and it all happened behind the walls of an impenetrable prison.
